To Share Or Not To Share (Part 1)

school-kids-sharingWhichever side you are on, you are welcome to express WHY.

We had 2 non-sharing encounters this week that fully brought my child to tears and here’s how we have learned that it’s okay TO SHARE and NOT TO SHARE.

Strike 1: Sunday Mass at the mall

A little girl next to us had lots of new stuff. A fishing toy, a Frozen story book, a fancy beaded necklace, and a Princess Sofia amulet.

Her grandparents, who appeared to have taken her out for a treat, were watching her play happily on the floor.

It was a picture of perfection. New toys – new books – princess accessories – happy quiet kiddo, Yay!

Except that, the mass was going on and my little one took interest with what she had.

Remember how toddlers think – whatever I see is mine, whatever I hold is considered mine, and whatever is in another kid’s hand could be mine? We may not have totally overcome this attitude yet.

So good luck.

To me.

When the little girl started browsing, Mia immediately blurted, I waaaaant.

I whispered, “It’s not ours, Mia. It belongs to her.”

But I waaaaaant…

“You can just sit beside her and peek.”

But I waaaaaant…

“Sshhhh.. Try to make friends with her and ask if you can borrow.”

But I’m shy.

“Here (handing over a Sofia toy that we brought along), share Sofia with her and maybe she’ll share her Frozen book with you.”

The little girl vehemently refused.

And my little one cried so hard. Sooo hard.

On homily time. 🙁

You could just imagine all the convicting eyes and all the glaring stares thrown at us.

“Sshhhh sshhh sshhh,” as I panicked and tried to calm her down.

Why she won’t share Mommy? Woowaaaaaa..

“I’m sorry anak, some kids don’t like to share..”

That didn’t console her, of course.

But that was the only thing I could say. She kept trying to offer the exchange but the other girl still wouldn’t share her new book.

It is only natural for the other kid not to. Don’t you think? It’s new. It’s hers. Any other kid trying to touch it is a threat. Sharing is a social skill that is not easily learned. Heck, even adults don’t immediately share their new stuff. Would you lend a fresh-from-the-box iPhone to your best friend when he asks for it? Nah..didn’t think so. So I totally understand.

Good thing though that another girl with OH toys (the alien from the movie Home) approached us. She introduced herself as KC and happily shared her 2 OHs with Mia. Mia offered her Sofia toy in return and she accepted. An angel from above!

And then the other girl with the Frozen book watched the two of them in envy as they played. I could sense she wanted the Oh toys too.


I’m not upset anymore, said our curlytops.

“That’s good. KC is nice, isn’t she? She likes to share.”

But the other kid doesn’t share.

“Yes, anak, there are some kids who don’t. And we have to respect that.”

Strike 2: Play day at the park.

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 Clip Art design by Laura Strickland