Do the highs outweigh the lows of parenting?

If you have a difficult child, you are not alone.

We may seem happy on Facebook and all but that’s because the good times are the only ones I get to capture and post.

The bad ones, well, they are bad. The last thing I can think of during a full-blown tantrum is to take a snapshot. Most of the time, we are in an intense state correcting bad behavior and worrying afterwards if we are actually doing things right.

Raising kids is no easy task. (I’m learning, Ma.)

I feel the struggle, especially now that Mia has picked up some lines from school and has started showing unwanted attitude when she doesn’t get her way.

It’s exhausting. Not to mention physically and emotionally draining to deal with a headstrong child.

Some nights I fall asleep praying for tomorrow to be a better day.

And thank God, it does.

Yes, our terrible twos, terrifying threes, and ferocious fours get into our nerves, but they always have a way to make up for it.

Do you agree?

Sure, they defy our rules to test our patience, throw embarrassing fits in public places, and jump on the bed no matter how many times we tell them not to.

But… they also do the sweetest things.

In the most adorable ways.

Kids are tender and loving and the surprising things they do refuel our power banks with enough energy to deal with the next struggles.

There’s this one night for example.

Mia was (for the Nth time) delaying sleep and I was running out of patience……….

MIA: Mommy, massage my back please and sing a lullaby. I want the Someone’s Waiting For You song and When You Wish Upon Star. And then I promise to sleep.

Anyone else who has a child demanding two lullabies at night?

Truthfully, I was desperate. So although I was too tired to crawl my fingers on her back, let alone sing, I obliged.

JING: Okay. But you have to keep your eyes closed.

MIA: Okay, Momma. Massage WHILE you sing okay?

(with specific instructions…do or be sleep deprived.)

JING: (ending the 2nd song) …when you wish upon a star… your dreams.. come true… Good night Mia.

After a few minutes of silence, she suddenly sat.

JING: (frowning) Hey, I thought you promised you’re going to keep your eyes closed? Why are you not sleeping yet?

MIA: I’ll tell you something, Mommy.

Mommy, I love you. You are my sunshine.

(Oh. How can I get mad now?)

JING: Awww. Your only sunshine?

MIA: Yes.

JING: I make you happy?

MIA: Yes.

JING: When skies are gray?

MIA: Yes.

JING: Awwww.. Thank you, Mia. You are my sunshine too.

MIA: No. You’re the only sunshine. I’m not your sunshine.

JING: You don’t want to be my sunshine?

MIA: Only you. Only adults.

JING: Okay…

And then things suddenly took a different turn.

MIA: I’ll massage you and sing to you too. What kind of massage do you like? Like this (showing her thumbs) or like this (moving her other fingers)?

JING: Um, the first one? Using your thumbs? (Is this serious?)

MIA: Okay!

And she did. She massaged my back and sang.

MIA:

You are my sunshine

My only sunshine

You make me happy

When skies are gray

You’ll never know dear

How much I love you

Please don’t take

My sunshine away

I WAS IN TEARS.

I may have jokingly prompted the lines during our conversation but it was at the least of my expectations that she’d sing it to me.

MIA: Okay. What’s the next massage that you like? Like this (demonstrating circular motion) or like this (caressing up and down)?

JING: In circles?

MIA: Okay.

You are my sunshine

My only sunshine

You make me happy

When skies are gray

You’ll never know dear

How much I love you

Please don’t take

My sunshine away

She did this two more times using the other movements she mentioned.

Boy.

I have been singing her lullabies for the past 4 years and I didn’t think the day would come that she’d do the same thing to me.

Kid singing a lullaby to put a parent to sleep. Times have changed! Yay!

It made me think that although it is hard to discipline resistant kids and even if it is tough to correct rude behavior, there is joy.

Joy amidst the stresses of parenting.

There are moments that warm the heart. Moments that make up for their demands. Moments that make you say,

Thank you God for letting me experience this. For giving me this blessing. For making me a MOM.

The next evening, she did the same thing to Daddyow. She sang and told him that he is her sunshine too.

You could just imagine how touched Chris was.

You’ll most likely see us smile whenever we hear that song from now on.

I guess the joys really outweigh the troubles.

We may be far from the finish line in this parenting thing, heck we’re not even halfway yet, but this is something we’ll keep and hold on to during hard days.

My answer is a big YES.

How about you? What are your parenting highs? Do you think they compensate for our struggles? Share in the comment box below.

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